Sad Good-byes

Good-bye’s are never easy, especially around our house, and Thursday was no exception. We said good-bye to daddy/hubbie for 3 long months and it wasn’t easy. We started the day with breakfast at the Egg and I and then came back to the house so that Carlton could finish packing and last-minute preparations. There was a sense of calmness once we got back to the house – the girls pretended together wonderfully (which is a rare thing) while Carlton showed me some things on the computer. The rest of the morning unfolded much like a normal day – Sarah played school and Julia played doctor and then talked me into painting. Around lunch time though, with Carlton’s 1:30 p.m. departure, the inevitable sinking feeling hit me hard. Carlton and the girls ate lunch; I just wasn’t hungry. And then he sat on the floor and the girls just crawled all over him, alternating just plain silliness with hugs and kisses. I tried to take a mental picture of all that laughter and love.

Another sweet thing I saw today was Julia walking down the stairs and Carlton was heading upstairs and they stopped to kiss (she in her little pink dress with her blond hair down, and he in his camo and boots). I didn’t have my camera out, and wouldn’t have captured that quick moment even if the camera had been handy, but I’m pretty sure I’ll never forget that sweet sight.

Sarah has gradually come to understand that daddy’s leaving on a long trip, but we know that her concept of time is much different than reality. She’s talked about it very matter-of-factly and seemed most interested in what present daddy will bring when he returns (he always brings home a small gift when he goes on a trip). So, one of the most memorable parts of the day was just a few minutes before we knew Carlton was leaving, the cab company called to let him know his cab would arrive soon. Sarah started crying and asking why a cab was picking him up and why he wasn’t taking his truck. It quickly became apparent that that was the part of this scenario that wasn’t playing out as it had in her mind. She began crying pretty hard which made the final good-bye with Carlton extremely emotional. All three of us were crying, and saying good-bye and then there was little Miss Julia – she wouldn’t give Carlton a hug or kiss and gathered up all of her shopping items (she’d been pretending to go to Target earlier) to wish him farewell. She wasn’t mean about it, just a little prissy, and daddy finally got his kiss.

Sarah and I made a bee-line for the couch to snuggle and sniffle as soon as Carlton was out the door, and Julia came over to pat Sarah on the back and covered her with her most-treasured blankie. Ahhh, this is what melts a mama’s heart! Then, in her little Julia-nese she said, “daddy, work, bye-bye,” and continued some combination of those three words for a little while. It was as if she couldn’t understand why we were so upset because daddy was just going to work.

As Carlton said, that was the hard part for him and now he can start looking forward to coming home. I too will start anticipating his return, but there will be many challenging days for me in the months to come. I’m thankful to have two beautiful girls to help fill the days for me though and couldn’t be more proud of my husband. Sorry for the novel – just had to spill all of the emotions of the day into writing.